Chapter 10: Is there one love?

It can be deadly to be over optimistic, isn't it? To presume that love exists, that love will someday take the perfect form of a human and would be in your arms. To be sure that the love that you've found is the best that you deserve and that the world that comprises of your friends or so called well wishers wouldn't try to tear the smooth seams of your love and make it difficult for you to feel the soft touch of love ever again in the rest of your life.

Peter was being one such optimist, looking for that man, he had found himself one from one of those online gay dating sites- skinny, tall, good-lookin', photography freak would describe his guy aptly. They had spent long hours together gazing at the evening sky trying to behold what they saw in their eyes. It was always a different shade of blue, purple, pink or orange or a gradient.

His second love - after his DSLR camera- was his bike, he loved speed, and cutting through air was his kind of a thrill. He took peter on rides often. Weekend getaways to lonavla in the monsoon were the most romantic of these rides apart from the town rides on odd evenings. They didn't bother where they were, who was around, everything seemed so perfectly lovely. On a pre-valentine evening Peter's professor saw him on one of these romance city rides. Sea facing road, bike and someone who you want to hug made the scene look just too much more than obvious for Peter's professor.

When encountered two days later at college, Peter chose to smile and walk away leaving the sight seen open to interpretation. Peter never felt shy nor did he ever feel guilty about doing anything that the world would tag as 'hanky panky', though he was closeted he believed in expressing himself whenever needed without being conscious about who is watching. It was a way he was fighting for the love he had found. Love that he had no clue if it would stay or was just here for a short visit.

Loving someone is a continuous process and the chemistry you share is the catalyst to keep it going. Love this time had happened over a few cups of coffee, evening sky gazes and bike rides apart from shared interests like films, photography and the despair for cricket.

Often in love you don't know things about each other because you never had a chance to say those things. It’s for you to find out in all the time that you spend together. And if there are things that bother it’s time to rethink your decision, is your love really worth fighting for. Peter believed the worst of love was worth fighting for, lying for, walking the mile for, dying for. It’s only then that you do the crazy things you do. But his love did not think so. 

"Is it too much to ask
For a real love,
Something that'll last?
Is there one love,
Only once in a lifetime?
It's so hard to find,
The perfect one to call mine
Is there one love
Somebody that compliments me?
And makes me wanna never leave?
Made just right for me?
Is there one love, one love, one love, one love?"

Chapter 9: Hablemos De Amor

James had started taking Spanish lessons at the university he had a strong affinity to the language, he called it the language of love. He often greeted Veron as 'Amor'. Love, the word captured all the feelings that James had developed for Veron in the past few months.

The guitar lessons had brought both of them closer, Veron was also learning how to sing from a renowned singer and music director, this was just part of his new extracurricular amongst other things, they made a great team together, one strum the guitar chords and the other his vocal. They also performed at their college festival and received quite an appreciation.

Soon days turned into weeks and weeks into months, it was a winter evening when as usual they sat together sipping coffee in the balcony before they could go in for the guitar lessons. They knew each other’s life in and out now or so did it appear to Veron, but there was a secret side to James that Veron never knew about clearly. There were many instances where James wanted to talk about it but he was afraid of losing whatever they had.

Almost every day was spent together at Veron’s home, mostly talking about random things, there were times when Veron fell sick and James would come over cook dinner for both of them, waited till Veron fell asleep or his father returned late night - the latter rarely happened - and returned early morning to wake him up and make breakfast. James was taking care of his 'Amor' in the true sense. He cared.

This was their second winter together to be precise, together as pals. Some of James close friends had planned for a night out in a forest, these were the common set of friends James and Veron had cause James had already introduced his 'Amor' to all his friends. His friends insisted that James got his amor along for the camping trip. Together they all made one great musical group, everyone played some musical instrument or the other, at the trip they were planning to play some Brazilian tribal songs in the forest, they had been practising it now and then.

James only mentioned about the plan and Veron exclaimed. “So when are we going?" this is what attracted James towards him, he was always open to new things, new experiences. James calmly replied, " Next Saturday, and it’s going to be fun, our first outing together". Maybe James said too much at that moment, but Veron was used to such to-be-romantic remarks, he only smiled and walked towards the kitchen to put away the empty coffee mugs.